i’ve been having this feeling for a week now. i cant focus and im starting to look for reasons to stay. im not sure if its just because its holidays and everyone is enjoying vacation. while im saying goodbye to them i can hear sad scoring in the back of my mind. all i can think of all day everyday is having fun and bumming around the house enjoying the cold and breezy weather. ive been starting to rummage my brains and force myself to stay rational and see what i must see and not what i want to see. i know i should grow up. =(